LAWYERS SAY THE DARNDEST THINGS

Attorneys have it in their head to try and probe every answer with follow-up questions.  The result can sometimes lead to ridicule.  These examples are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts. 

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!

ATTORNEY: The youngest son , the 20-year-old , how old is he?
WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ.

ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town, I’m going with male.